February 13 – February 21 is the observance of Parentalia, literally “Ancestors Days” or “Days of the Ancestors,” a nine-day festival celebrating the deceased ancestors of the family and the paterfamilias. Offerings of bouquets and garlands of flowers, especially violets, salt, wheat, and bread soaked in wine are made at the family tombs. Temples are closed for the duration of the festival, marriages are forbidden, no public worship is to be made to the Gods (but household rites may continue), and no official business is permitted.

Often they are providing a true sacrificial banquet, but these are di inferni, spirits of the underworld.  They are those who dwell below, and proper care must be made in sacrificing to them.

The Parentalia ends on February 21, with the Feralia, a public sacrifice to the Manes, unruly spirits of the dead.

Often they are providing a true sacrificial banquet, but these are di inferni, spirits of the underworld.  They are those who dwell below, and proper care must be made in sacrificing to them.

 

Dumb Supper

A way that Parentalia can be celebrated is by holding a “dumb” supper. In this case, the word “dumb” refers to being silent.

Here, all outside distractions are turned off (such as electronic devices) and the place is sanctified, whether through incense or by sprinkling a bit of khernips. The point is to remain silent.

A place at the table for each guest should be set up, however the head of the table is reserved for the spirits of the dead. A candle can be placed at the seat of the ancestors. The host of the meal should be seated directly across from the Spirit chair.

Each guest entering should stop before the seat and offer a prayer to the dead. If there are multiple people attending, they may join their hands and take a moment to silently bless the meal. From here the host should serve the meal to guests in order of age, from the oldest to youngest. No one should eat until everyone, including the spirits, are served.

Once the meal is done everyone may leave the room in silence. Stop at the Spirit chair as you make way to the exit and give your goodbyes another time.

Any food given to the dead should not be eaten. As it is chthonic in nature, it should be disposed of completely. Cleanse the area with khernips.

 

Caristia

A related festival, the Caristia, follows on February 22. On this day, family disagreements were to be mended, and family members gathered together to honor the Lares (household deities), share food, and exchange gifts.

 

Bibliography

HonorTheGods. “Parentalia.” Honor the Gods. October 06, 2016. Accessed October 07, 2017. http://honorthegods.tumblr.com/post/157199116771/les-alyscamps-arles-province-france-photography

“Parentalia.” Parentalia – NovaRoma. Accessed February 13, 2018. http://www.novaroma.org/nr/Parentalia.

TheLettuceMan. “Hālige Dagas.” Of Axe and Plough. June 18, 2017. Accessed December 05, 2017. https://thelettuceman.wordpress.com/about-eofores-holt-heorth/halige-dagas/.

Wigington, Patti. “Here’s How to Host a Dumb Supper for Samhain.” ThoughtCo. Accessed February 13, 2018. https://www.thoughtco.com/feast-with-the-dead-2562707